I’ve been writing a lot lately and some of it has made it onto my blog. My focus has been on exploring my Inner Child and my life purpose. I’ve made some discoveries about myself that I’m happy to share as they are setting me free from the constant internal debate that is all too familiar to many of us, me included.
I want to let myself fly! Let myself be free! Let myself be in my own truth as I remain steady within myself! This inner child of mine wants to be free, she wants to explore life, she wants to express herself and be creative and she wants to make her own rules and see what works for her. She’s tired of trying to be perfect and playing to everyone else’s rules.
I know I want to nourish my soul by being creative in ideas, in dress, in music, in words, in art. I need to remember this to keep the fire of the wild woman burning within me. She is easy to lose, she tries to escape but she is worth nurturing and fighting for. She is akin to my Inner Child and knows all about me, from where I came and the trials, tribulations and joys that followed and brought me to where I am at this point in my life. I feel satisfied when the wild woman and the Inner Child within me are well nourished and are happy and free to come out to play whenever and wherever they need.
I want to engage with my own life – I don’t have to be perfect, amazing or revered by everyone or even anyone. I want to remember the ‘why’ of my life and to live by it. I want that ‘why’ to dictate how I spend my time, what I live my life by. I can make a difference and be a part of the active movement to better the world and to better prepare the next generation for the future, theirs and as a result, ours as a collective. That is my ‘why’. I want to open to guidance both from the universe and my own intuition, my own higher self.
Centre! Ground! Write! Sing! Play! Walk! Run! Skip! Cook – be real in my life!
I want to bring my attention to my heart instead of my head. It is where I will find life’s answers. My heart never lies and always gives good advice. I want to be brave and ask my heart questions that my head will never be able to answer as it lies without all the doubts and theories that keep going around and around in my head, sometimes day and night. My heart is pure love, pure intuition and pure knowing. It will set me free from the constant chatter, the constant internal debate.
I’ve had a few hard days as I’ve sat with my Inner Child and reflected and wrote. They looked something like this –so many emotions coming to the surface, so much resistance to accepting the pain of facing up to who I am, the little girl who actively hides from shining, engaging, taking responsibility. I acknowledged that Instead I let others take over, take the credit and shine, allowing me to hide in peace and comfort. Inevitably I felt conflicted for the childhood that allowed these patterns to develop. Then….. I experienced turning this into simply accepting my life without apportioning blame, it’s continuing to evolve. We are all results of our circumstances and generational issues, usually beyond anyone’s control, certainly in my own life. I needed to rise above that need for blame and to simply accept who I am. There is no timeframe for full acceptance and there is much learning to be done on the way. My goal is to keep true to myself and stand in my own space, in my own power. To even be on the path is a blessing and a relief.